Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Not sure what to think

Ok, so today my temp went up a little. Not great, but a start. I've been waiting for aunt flow to start but do not feel like it is even eminent. That is not to say it won't show up say tomorrow, but maybe it won't show up at all? Is it even possible anymore? Or am I too far along to even have that possibilty in this cycle. As cruel as it is, I find myself still praying that I'm pregnant this cycle. M started seeing this situation with a touch of reality that he's never had before. He started realizing that just because we want to have a baby and we would make great parents doesn't mean that we will get the opportunity. That was sad for me to hear. I'm well aware of that, but to hear that my husband who has always believed that all you have to do is want it to get it say we may not get the chance to be parents was hard. I don't want him to become disillusioned and hardened because of this. I know it's good that he has a touch of reality to the situation. I just wish this was something he never had to experience. They say what does not kill us makes us stronger. I had hoped that we would be strong enough already. That we would finally get our break. It's still a waiting game to find out for sure. As silly as it is, I still find myself hopful even after all that we've faced so far. Guess we'll just have to wait to see....

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